i only make jokes to distract myself from the truth

so i’m doing okay.

some days blow through my fingers like sand and some seem to just tick by slow as a mountain.

i switched out my super huge, heavy comforter for a lighter duvet as it’s been in the 40s for a few days (heat wave, yo), and i’m still trying to get used to not being able to kick out, stretch out, toss and turn without losing covers.

it’s around 7:40 in the evening now, and i worked this morning until 1, and then i went shopping, then i came home and me and my mom made lentil and squash patties, stuffed them in pitas, and made a salad, baked parsnips, et cetera. it’s one of those home delivery deals that we’re trying out, where the company sends the ingredients and the recipe and you make the meal. lol my mom was always curious, and i daresay i was also, a little. and it was pretty good. i’m a super finicky eater, especially when it comes to meat and seafood so we got the vegan option just to be safe. i liked the food but not sure it is worth the price.

i daydreamed all through the CO procedures, pretending i was somewhere else. that i wasn’t alone. ugh but i am. everywhere. class is kind of weighing on me because i feel the usual cliche feelings: i’m not like the other kids. for one, i’m not a kid anymore. i just feel like i have more on my mind than them. but this is a fleeting feeling. i know they have things on their mind too, important things. but i just get so exhausted from trying to be friends with everyone, that i get overwhelmed and discouraged when no one responds in kind. PLS RESPOND.

i miss certain people, a lot. but i don’t wanna think about that, so i’m done.

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