when i first started college i messed up miserably. i didn’t go to class, instead i partied and hung out at the park like a delinquent drug dealer. i was so depressed and miserable.. still am. but now i’m back home so i don’t have any distractions. i’m taking everything one step at a time like a child. i really am like a child. like a really dysfunctional, foul-mouthed child. but i try so hard at everything. why are things that terrify other people normal for me while the normal things are to me gargantuan monstrosities that can scarcely be overcome?